Tuesday, April 13, 2004

I fight the feeling and I keep going. Not quite understanding why I'm doing it. I think as time goes on you wonder more and more untill you wonder how you've ended up somewhere. Work has always been a struggle for me. Just staying awake at work is a challenge.

I think all of the time. Even the busiest times at the resturaunt my mind is elsewhere, thinking about bigger things. Those things seem to slip away like a fading dream though. I ignore everything that's going on around me and drift into that dream. My body keeps moving, but I am a thousand miles away. So why do I get so upset? Why am I so tense when I come home? Why do I get so angry? It's like a bad dream you wake up screaming to. I will not let my life be defined by my part-time job.

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